All About You — Day 16: If Only One Year to Live

Wednesday, August 27th 2008 by Shanel Yang         Email this article to a friend

[For “Day 15: The Big ‘Do Over,’” click here.]

ALL ABOUT YOU — DAY 16:

IF ONLY ONE YEAR TO LIVE

When we were kids, waiting for tomorrow seemed endless if we were going to Disneyland—or someplace equally fun—the next day. Our young brains couldn’t even fathom next week, let alone next month. And, as for next year, you might as well be talking about the next millennium!

But, of course, time didn’t stay so slow for us as we grew older. As soon as we started school, it felt like weekends, holidays, and summer vacations got shorter every year. Then, after we began working full time, time really began to shrink. It seemed as soon as we were done celebrating another year, the next one came bumping up right behind us before we could even begin to process the memories of all the birthdays, graduations, weddings, and, yes, funerals that had gone on the year before. Everything just sort of blended together. We lost track of what had just happened in our lives in our constant quest to get ahead for the years ahead. But, what if we didn’t have years? What if we only had one year?

Would you slow down or speed up? You might start by reading the wisdom of others about existence. (See, e.g., “200 Existence Quotes.”) But, in the end, you’d have to make up your own mind. Would you still cave in to your family’s or friends’ ideas about how you should live your life? Or, would you, finally, in your last year on this big, beautiful planet full of amazing people, places, and experiences, decide to do only—and possibly all—the things you’ve ever wanted. That’s exactly what Jack Nicholson’s and Morgan Freeman’s characters did in “The Bucket List.” Great movie!

When you ask yourself this question and try to answer it seriously, you are left with more clues about who you are, what you want, and how to get there from here. : )

BRAINSTORMING EXERCISE

1. Preparation

Clear your mind of all other thoughts. If stray thoughts not related to this exercise wander into your mind, let them drift right back out of your mind without paying any special attention to it. (If you think it’s something important that you’re afraid to forget later, just jot it down quickly and let it out of your thoughts again.)

2. Let it All Flow Freely

Use paper or the computer. Whatever is more comfortable for you. Jot down or type everything. Don’t cross out or delete anything (even if you suspect you might have already recorded it). Don’t reread your answers either (or check if you already recorded it) because doing so will break the flow. Just keep going. Ask yourself the question repeatedly and write down every answer that pops into your mind.

Complete this sentence: “If I had only one year to live, I’d …”

a. Stay in the Present

There are probably hundreds of possible answers to this question. I list below the ones that immediately came to my mind as the answers that different people might come up with. Don’t judge yourself based on your own answers. That’s not the point of this exercise. The words you choose are merely clues to help you see and start to understand the bigger picture of who you are right now, right here—as well as who you no longer are or who you would like to be but have not become yet.

b. Possible Answers Others Might Have

quit the job/career immediately
tell everyone exactly what you think
stop dealing with anyone you don’t want to
eat anything w/o worries about diet or weight gain
smoke and/or drink anything w/o worries about health
stop going to the gym or anything else that’s “good for you” that you don’t like
start a diary and record all thoughts and feelings (decide whether to burn it later)
hang out with friends and family as much as possible
tell family and friends everything you want them to know
forgive everyone you can
apologize to everyone you feel you should
make amends to everyone you feel you should
hike to the top of the Half Dome
run a marathon
plant a garden
get a puppy or kitten—or both!
finally see Disneyland, Vegas, Hawaii, and Mexico
finally see Europe (London, Paris, Rome, etc.)
visit every place you’ve ever lived
visit every place you’ve ever wanted to live
rent a luxury sports car for at least one day
stay in a luxury hotel for at least one night
dine in the finest restaurants a few times
see all the movies you wanted to see
read all the books you wanted to read
write fan letters to all your heroes
try to meet your heroes in person
try to contact all your old friends
try to make a lot of new, different friends
try to give away most or all of your stuff
try spontaneity
try being “not your usual self” (perhaps more of your “true” self)
try being a little “wild and crazy”
try a water fast
try nude sunbathing
try skinny dipping
try finger painting
try flying a kite
try playing “kick the can”
try playing tag, hide and seek, and dodgeball
try going to haunted houses
try riding scary roller coaster rides
try sending “secret admirer” cards and gifts
try Christmas caroling
try reading kids’ classics
try watching kids’ classics
try coloring books
try paper mache
try origami
try flower arranging
try horseback riding
try ballroom dancing
try skiing or snowboarding
try riding a motorcycle
try roller skating
try skydiving
try scuba diving (or at least snorkeling)
try to swim (if you don’t know how)
try bungee jumping
try pleasure drugs
try sex (or different kinds of sex)
try going to a rock concert
try going to an opera
try singing on stage at karaoke
try giving a speech
try different ethnic foods
try different houses of worship
try volunteering at hospitals or missions
try volunteering at events for kids’ sports, etc.
try learning how to say “hello” in different languages
try random acts of kindness
try giving smiles to everyone and hugs, too!

c. My Answers

update my will, etc.
keep blogging : )
keep eating/drinking as I do now (mostly raw food—it just feels better!)
turn my blog into more of a diary with much shorter posts so I can …
write the novel I’ve been putting off, Letters from Your Best Friend
write the Immigrant’s Bible, the Teen’s Bible, and the Rags-to-Riches Bible
get medieval on all my stuff and declutter down to the bare minimum
write long letters to all my friends thanking them for their specialness
give away my prized and/or sentimental possessions
make arrangements to discharge all responsibilities
finally travel to and spend some quality time at:

the White Cliffs of Dover
the Great Wall of China
the Louvre
the Great Pyramid
the Nile
the Amazon

have a quiet lunch, dinner, or drinks alone with:

Oprah Winfrey
J. K. Rowling
Madonna
Criss Angel
Tony Robbins
Warren Buffett

spend at least a month on Santorini with my boyfriend!

when the time comes,
stay up all night with my boyfriend—
sunrise to sunset and back again

TO BE CONTINUED …

This is going to be an adventurous journey into our past, present, and future lives. None of us can be prepared for what we might find along the way. So, just sit back and enjoy the ride! Also, I hope at least some of you brave souls will share your answers, insights, and revelations in the comments below for everyone’s benefit!

When you’re done, collect your answers and keep them in a safe place. I recommend a diary. It makes a precious gift to someone you love, especially you!

[For “Day 17: Your Purpose in Life,” click here.]

[For entire “All About You!” series, click here.]

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[For “My 10 Commandments,” click here.]

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