What Kind of Ump Are You?
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There are generally three world views about reality; and, all parents, teachers, and bosses hold at least one of them. Depending on which one you hold, your “management” style affects how well your children, students, and employees respond to your attempts to teach them anything new or to otherwise influence or change their behavior.
If you want to become better at influencing other people (and who doesn’t?), then first ask yourself which of the three umpires’ views on “reality” below most accurately describes your own world view.
THE 3 UMPIRES’ VIEWS ON REALITY
Umpire No. 1: “Some’s balls and some’s strikes and I calls ‘em as they is.”
Umpire No. 2: “Some’s balls and some’s strikes and I calls ‘em as I sees ‘em.”
Umpire No. 3: “Some’s balls and some’s strikes but they ain’t nothin’ till I calls ‘em.”
Aside from the funny English slang, these three umpires are expressing some major differences in how they perceive reality.
Umpire No. 1 believes that there is only one reality. Things are either black or white. And, worse, he firmly believes that he can always tell the difference. He has never even entertained the possibility that there is a grey area or that he might be wrong at least sometimes. Parents, teachers, and bosses who hold a similar world view are too rigid in their parenting, teaching, and management methods. It’s always their way or the highway. There’s no room for disagreement or compromise. Consequently, their children, students, and employees all inevitably grow to resent them. They never do more than the bare minimum required because, not only is their creativity or initiative not rewarded, it’s punished!
Umpire No. 2 also believes there is only one reality, but at least he admits he might not always see it correctly. People who hold this view still teach their children, students, and employees that there is a right way and a wrong way to do things but they are open to suggestions on what the best way is. This encourages the people under them to participate in the process of problem solving and, therefore, contribute to the positive growth of the family, society, and business. Most enlightened parents, teachers, and bosses fall into this category of world views.
Umpire No. 3 is the rarest of them all. He sees the world as not really existing apart from what we make of it. If we say it is so, then it is so. That’s a huge responsibility for parents, teachers, and bosses to assume. And, for those of us who accept these all-important positions (made all-important by the very fact that we are entrusted with the minds and bodies—if not the hearts—of those who must listen to us), we should take care to present the world not as an absolute list of certainties carved in stone but as a vast universe of possibilities to be experienced anew by each person and eventually called whatever you want to call it.
CONCLUSION
I’ve been lucky enough to have had a few Umpire No. 3’s in my life. They were always the ones who—when I said, “I could never do that”—asked me, simply, “Why not?” And, sometimes, they added, “I think you could.” They always put me in the awkward position of trying to defend my ultimately indefensible belief that I couldn’t do something even though I hadn’t ever really tried it. So, of course, I had to really try it just to prove it to both of us. Of course, once I got started, I realized that my fears were phantom. Thanks, Guys! You know who you are!
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